|
|
|
|
|
Billy-Bob's 'Do's' (But - Generally - Don't) |
|
|
| 1. Don't worry about citations
(this is lifted somewheres...)
2. Never generalize. 3. Be more or less specific. 4. Exaggeraton is a billion times worse than understatement. 5. Understatement is always best. 6. Avoid cliches like the plague--their ol' hat. 7. Comparisons are as bad as cliches. 8. Foreign words are never apropos. 9. It's dead wrong to ever spilt infinitives. 10. Don't use contractions. 11. Don't be repetitious or redundant or say the same thing over and over again--it's superflous & plain gilds the lilly. 12. Employ the vernacular with vehemence! 13. Avoid alliteration--absolutely any and all--always. 14. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. 15. Go around the barn at 12 noon to avoid colloquialisms. 16. Analogies in writing good are like feathers on a rock. 17. Even if a mixed metaphor sings it should be derailed. 18. Don't use quotations, as Bartlett said, 'I hate quotes, just tell me what you know.' 19. Who needs rhetorical questions? 20. One-word sentences? Eliminate! 21. Parenthetical remarks (however good) are unnecessary. 22. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with. Even if you know where Harvard Square is at, ah, Professor Nadir-Meister.... 23. The passive voice is always to be avoided. |
ufhatch@ufl.edu
rah.feb.1998
|
|